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#724 — Top 39.4%

coffeeaddict

Hartog C. de Mik

D

README enthusiast

Overall

0.0

/ 100

01 · Roasts

The Time Capsule Developer

Your last push was September 12, 2014. That's not a career pause — that's a geological epoch. The heatmap is 52 weeks of pure void. GitHub is displaying your profile like an archaeological dig site.

Stub Tests, Real Hubris

has_eav brags HAS_TESTS=yes, but they're stub tests — placeholder skeletons with no assertions. That's not testing, that's theatrical compliance. You put the 'no' in 'no coverage'.

55 Repos, Zero Commits This Year

You have 55 public repos and a totalCommitsYear of exactly 0. That's a ratio so efficient it breaks math. You've built a museum, not a portfolio.

100% Stale Ratio Hall of Famer

staleRepoRatio = 1.0. Every. Single. Repo. Pushed more than 2 years ago. Not 99%. Not 'most of them'. All of them. You achieved a perfect score in the wrong category.

Ruby Monolith in a Polyglot World

71% Ruby, 22% JavaScript, 7% Perl — in 2024 this reads like a vintage wine list from a restaurant that closed in 2014. The Perl is not helping your case.

Built using

Zoral

Shadows one worker for a week, then takes over their job with zero extra setup. Behaves exactly like the original.

zoral.ai

02 · Category breakdown

  • Impact
    25% weight
    25F
  • Consistency
    20% weight
    55D
  • Quality
    20% weight
    44D
  • Depth
    15% weight
    50D
  • Breadth
    10% weight
    55D
  • Community
    10% weight
    25F

03 · Stats

365-day commit heatmap

0 active days

Less
More

Language distribution

4 langs
  • Ruby71%
  • JavaScript22%
  • Perl7%
  • Shell0%

04 · Numbers

Owned repos

non-fork

31

Commits

last 12 months

0

Followers

39

Joined GitHub

Apr 2009

05 · Top repos

06 · Timeline

  1. Apr 17, 2009
    Joined GitHub
  2. Sep 25, 2010
    Created ruote-amqp-ping-pong — An example of ruote and ruote-amqp
  3. Dec 10, 2010
    Created has_eav — Straight forward EAV behaviour for Rails3
  4. Oct 24, 2012
    Created kindergarten — A kindergarten for ruby objects to provide Modularity and Security.
  5. Mar 17, 2014
    Most recent push to kindergarten

07 · Compare

github.com/
coffeeaddict · 6dmedian coder

08 · Rubric

How this score was produced

Overall = Σ (category × weight) + gentle top-end curve

CategoryWeightScoreContrib.
Raw total41.5
Top-end curve+1.2
Final overall42.7

Tier thresholds

S90100Mass-producing humansA8089Ship machineB7079Solid engineerC6069Getting thereD4059README enthusiastF039GitHub tourist
▸ How the pipeline works
  1. 01Scrape.Pull every non-fork repo pushed in the last 90 days, plus your contribution calendar, followers, and language byte counts — straight from GitHub's REST & GraphQL APIs.
  2. 02Triage.A small model reads every repo's file tree + README and picks the 20 files per repo that actually reveal how you code.
  3. 03Grade each repo. All repos run in parallel through a fast scoring model that reads the picked files and rates each one independently on Impact, Quality, and Depth — with evidence citations.
  4. 04Aggregate. A larger reasoning model combines the per-repo scores with server-computed stats (heatmap, commit cadence, language entropy, follower count) to produce the 6-dimension profile score + roasts.
  5. 05Correct.Deterministic server-side checks enforce anchor-scale floors (e.g. a profile with 2,000+ public commits can't score 30 Consistency) and recompute the final verdict.

~90 seconds per profile, ~$0.25 in compute. Total of ~240 files read across your top-12 repos. One rating per GitHub account per day.

▸ Data sources & caveats
  • Heatmap & commit totals: GitHub GraphQL contributionsCollection — covers the last 365 days, includes private repos when the user has opted in (default).
  • Language %: byte totals across the top 30 owned non-fork repos.
  • Curve: a small upward nudge centered on raw score ≈ 70, capping at 100. Prevents specialists from being unfairly penalised for narrow breadth.
  • Anchor corrections: when server-measured signals (e.g. privateWorkLikely, multiRepoVolume, follower count) mandate a minimum category score, the aggregation step enforces it. These are signal-conditional, not identity-based floors.
coffeeaddict · 42.7/100 — Rate My GitHub