01 · Roasts
One Commit Year
Your entire 2024–2025 contribution heatmap is a single green pixel. 364 days of pure white space. GitHub's 'Your contributions' section is basically just a loading spinner that never resolves.
Google Maps v2 Called
UW-Maps-v2 uses the Google Maps v2 API — an API that was deprecated in 2010 and fully shut down in 2013. Your code was a museum exhibit before the repo was even cold.
Portfolio Site, No Portfolio
topherh.github.io advertises consulting services but contains no projects, no case studies, and no README. It's a storefront with empty shelves and a 'Back in 5 minutes' sign that's been up since 2020.
16-Year GitHub Veteran
Joined GitHub in April 2009 — that's 16 years — and accumulated a grand total of 1 star across 8 repos. That's roughly 0.0625 stars per year of membership. Statistically indistinguishable from zero.
Built using
Zoral
Shadows one worker for a week, then takes over their job with zero extra setup. Behaves exactly like the original.
zoral.ai
02 · Category breakdown
- Impact25% weight15F
- Consistency20% weight55D
- Quality20% weight22F
- Depth15% weight50D
- Breadth10% weight55D
- Community10% weight25F
03 · Stats
365-day commit heatmap
1 active days
Language distribution
- JavaScript41%
- HTML20%
- CSS18%
- PHP13%
- Shell6%
- Vim Script2%
04 · Numbers
Owned repos
non-fork
3
Commits
last 12 months
1
Followers
20
Joined GitHub
Apr 2009
05 · Top repos
topherh /
Homestash
Personal dotfiles and shell script collection from 2011 with minimal adoption (1 star). Untyped shell/bash scripts lack tests, CI, and structured documentation. Last push 2020; modest architectural scope.
topherh /
topherh.github.io
Personal Jekyll portfolio site with minimal content and no documentation. Boilerplate GitHub Pages setup with marketing copy but no technical substance or project material.
topherh /
UW-Maps-v2
University campus map web app using deprecated Google Maps API v2 (2009-era code). No README, tests, CI, or documentation. Single 3-minute commit with unstructured jQuery/PHP files. Essentially a one-shot dump with no ongoing maintenance.
06 · Timeline
- Apr 8, 2009Joined GitHub
- Jul 20, 2011Created Homestash — dotfiles for customization of the workstation experience
- Jan 8, 2020Created topherh.github.io
- Apr 27, 2020Created UW-Maps-v2
- Dec 5, 2025Most recent push to topherh.github.io
07 · Compare
08 · Rubric
How this score was produced
Overall = Σ (category × weight) + gentle top-end curve
Tier thresholds
▸ How the pipeline works
- 01Scrape.Pull every non-fork repo pushed in the last 90 days, plus your contribution calendar, followers, and language byte counts — straight from GitHub's REST & GraphQL APIs.
- 02Triage.A small model reads every repo's file tree + README and picks the 20 files per repo that actually reveal how you code.
- 03Grade each repo. All repos run in parallel through a fast scoring model that reads the picked files and rates each one independently on Impact, Quality, and Depth — with evidence citations.
- 04Aggregate. A larger reasoning model combines the per-repo scores with server-computed stats (heatmap, commit cadence, language entropy, follower count) to produce the 6-dimension profile score + roasts.
- 05Correct.Deterministic server-side checks enforce anchor-scale floors (e.g. a profile with 2,000+ public commits can't score 30 Consistency) and recompute the final verdict.
~90 seconds per profile, ~$0.25 in compute. Total of ~240 files read across your top-12 repos. One rating per GitHub account per day.
▸ Data sources & caveats
- Heatmap & commit totals: GitHub GraphQL
contributionsCollection— covers the last 365 days, includes private repos when the user has opted in (default). - Language %: byte totals across the top 30 owned non-fork repos.
- Curve: a small upward nudge centered on raw score ≈ 70, capping at 100. Prevents specialists from being unfairly penalised for narrow breadth.
- Anchor corrections: when server-measured signals (e.g. privateWorkLikely, multiRepoVolume, follower count) mandate a minimum category score, the aggregation step enforces it. These are signal-conditional, not identity-based floors.